Work At Home, Stay At Home Mom

I just got back from the ABC show in Las Vegas and I don’t think my feet have touched the ground yet. I came off of the red eye on Wednesday morning, a grueling sleepless flight. Not to mention Jason left for his job in LA the night before and my mom came in to help out during the hand off.

Yesterday, I picked up Ryder from school with the girls and we all headed to the playground afterwards. I was thankful that the sun was shining and the kids were able to get their energy out for a few hours before heading home to cook dinner. As I walked into the playground a mom made a comment “Oh I never see you in the playground after school“. This is not the first time she’s made a judgmental comment to me. Other times include “Oh I haven’t seen you at pick up in a while”, “I saw your babysitter yesterday”, and “Let’s hang out, but I know you are soooo busy“. I responded “We are in the playground all the time”? But what I really wanted to say was “Are you trying to imply that I deprive my children of the playground or that I am never around”.

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I am a work at home, stay at home mom. So yes, there are days when I cannot pick up my son because I am on a conference call. But I will say four times out of five I am at school pickup. Maybe we are not at that playground everyday because we are either at another one, have a playdate, have an appt for the girls, or at Ryder’s tutor or therapist. Or perhaps I have taken my children to a pretty cool blogger event after school, since those happen often. I don’t think I have to explain myself, but I’m pretty infuriated with the constant commenting. There could be a ton of reasons why she feels the need to keep making these comments, but here are a few things you need to know about stay at home, work at home moms, especially bloggers like me.

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I get over 100 emails a day.

My babysitter is only three days a week, so I’m sure you don’t see her as often as you say.

I know the title “blogger” don’t sound like much, but I am providing financially for my family too. It’s not just a few extra bucks to go shopping.

My husband travels, a lot, so usually its just me for a two week stint at a time.

I have conference calls, and when dealing with brands, they sometimes need to be after 2:40pm.

I not only write on my blog, I work for other online publications, and also as a creative director for brands.

I have deadlines.

When I travel for trips, like my recent one to Vegas, its not for fun. It’s work. I didn’t see the light of day the entire time I was there.

Although I work, I am still home and responsible for all the household chores: cooking, cleaning, and not to mention waking up several times in the middle of the night with all three kids.

When my children are sleeping, I am working. When my children are napping, I am working.

My children are just fine, they see me plenty.

Being a work at home, stay at home mom is like having two jobs and trying to manage both at the exact same time. Is it hard, yes 100%, but do I love it, yes 100%. I am able to have the flexibility to be there for my children, yet maintain a career which I think is key. Moms, please don’t judge. We all should support one another as we are just trying to do the best we can for our children, the best way we know how.

 

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11 thoughts on “Work At Home, Stay At Home Mom”

  1. Great post and well done being all of those amazing things for your children, your husband and yourself! The ‘mom judgement’ has been one of the most surprising and most disappointing challenges I’ve had in my transition to mommyhood. I’m clearly naive I as I had this grand idea that being around other moms would be warm and cozy and supportive….there is some of that but not nearly as much as I anticipated.

  2. Well said!!
    Being pregnant with baby #3 and working full time, everyone asks how are you going to do it??? Well… If there’s a will there’s a way!!! I will do my best to provide for my kids and try my hardest to be there as much as I could. We don’t need to be judged by anyone! Brianne you’re doing an awesome job! And I look forward to reading your blogs because I can always relate in some way.

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  4. I love this post. It rings 100% true for us work at home/stay at home moms, especially this “being a work at home, stay at home mom is like having two jobs and trying to manage both at the exact same time.” Exactly! It is so hard to not be affected by the comments from other people, but you have to know that you are doing what is best for your family and there are some things other people will never understand. Keep at it, mama!

  5. This is so very realtable! We are all just doing the best we can. You are doing an incredible job for your family – as other mamas are doing what works for their own. I’ve suffered the same sort of judgements and we never really know what they are rooted in. Let these sorts of occurrences be lessons in how we NEVER want to make others feel.

    And you are doing and AMAZING job with your lovely family. xxx

  6. GREAT POST!
    Honestly, people can be such jealous haters! Nameless/faceless negative commenters are cowards!
    You are an amazing mother! Never forget it! And you are such a dedicated and savvy businesswoman…you should’t have to apologize for that. We should support each other, rather than try to knock each other down! KEEP DOING IT BABE!!! You are a champion!

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